The second example of Ed’s powers of perspicacity was when I was mounting a production of "The Ritz". Now if you’ve ever done community theatre, you know that it’s a group effort and everyone pitches in to get the show up and running. Our runs averaged 9 weeks with 4 performances a week, and our sets were built like houses in order to withstand the rigors of an extended run, meaning lots of ¾” plywood and 2-by-4’ construction. I asked Ed to "rip" or saw a ¾” plywood sheet; normally 4 feet by 8 feet and weighing about 30lbs. Now, most people would secure the heavy plywood sheet atop some sawhorses, position themselves to the side, and saw downwards. At most, a ten-minute sawing job by hand; two-minute with a circular-saw. I did say Ed wasn’t the shiniest spoon at the table, didn’t I? Well, after 5 minutes, I came back onstage and lo and behold, there’s Ed sweating beneath the ¾” plywood sheet, covered in sawdust, holding it up with one hand, and sawing upwards with a handsaw. He’d gotten about three inches cut of an 8-foot long piece.
“Ed, what are you doing?”
Blink. Blink. Vacant look. “ Sawing.”
“Didn’t want to use the Skilsaw?”
Look. Spot the circular saw next to him. “Oh. Yeah.”
But let us remember, that Ed’s second goal in life was not to be a competent set builder or construction industry tradesman.
